Brachydactyly type D and Me
I have Brachydactyly type D also known as BDD.
I belong to about 3% of the world’s population that has Brachydactyly type D. I was born with BDD and so for me, it is simply a part of who I am.
Yup, I’m totally down with my toe thumbs.
Also called stub thumbs, Barney Rubble thumbs or club thumbs. It used to even be known as murderer’s thumb which sounds totally bad ass and awful at the same time.
I never used to be down with the BDD. I was quite embarrassed of them as a child. You would be too if you constantly heard the following when the toe thumbs were eventually discovered:
- “Oh my God, what happened to your thumbs?”
- “Holy crap, did your thumbs get cut off in an accident?”
- “Did you slam your thumbs in the car door?”
- “WTF are those things?” (followed by tears of blood and the gnashing of teeth.)
The BDD thumbs are short and fat with wide nails. I used to view them as ugly little things; chubby digits that looked pissed off and annoyed, but now I can see them for what they really are. Voluptuous beauties that dare to be different.
And only really good-looking people have them. (Okay, I made this up.)
Only brown-eyed people have them.
All right, I made this up too. Truth is, there is no rhyme or reason other than they seem to be hereditary (my grandpa had them) or may be “caused by frostbite”. (Note to self – never go see Dr. Steven Bendner about my toe thumbs.) Frostbite? I wonder how many babies in their mother’s womb suffer from frostbite?
So what does this have to do with books? Well nothing, other than my big, fat thumbs are awesome at holding down book pages. You know what else they are awesome at? Giving massages. And pushing down a really big button.
What me and my Brachydactyly type D thumbs aren’t so awesome at:
- 10 pin bowling (you try stuffing these voluptuous thumbs into that damned hole)
- Texting (I developed tendonitis thanks to being forced to strain my poor chubby thumbs to hit the appropriate button)
- Typing (Same as texting)
- Thumb wars (Total disadvantage here folks, on the plus side, if ever there was a mandatory thumb war draft, I wouldn’t have to go)
- Flicking a lighter (or maybe that’s just me and I’m an idiot)
I’ve learned to live with all of the above with grace and humour. I am proud of my toe thumbs and all that we have been through. So who cares if I could never get fake nails growing up in the 80’s because no fake nails anywhere were wide enough for my thumb? So what if I can’t wear any pretty thumb rings because they are too small and won’t fit over my big, bulbous thumb tip? What is the point of thumb rings anyway? Can’t we be satisfied with just having rings on our fingers?
You see, these things don’t matter to me anymore. In fact, I’m pretty sure that what I read as horror on people’s faces as a child, was actually delight. Yes, my thumbs are delightful.
Brachydactyly type D and me, we jive now. We are one. We are copacetic.
*On an interesting side note, various descriptions of the club thumb as it relates to the science of palmistry have brought me to the conclusion that I am not as crass, aggressive or evil as my toe thumbs indicate I should be. But hey, I’m a work in progress.
This was my attempt to tell you something about myself. Don’t get too used to it; Brachydactyly type D’s are known for their introverted nature and preference for privacy.
Okay, I made that up too.